Soul + Partner

Last year around this time, I chose to write a blog that was very representative of my journey towards self-love, and that post is by far one of my favorite expressions of unbridled vulnerability. I absolutely encourage you to revisit this read for those who follow the blog, and if not, you are so in for a delicious treat, and you can dig into all things ‘Solitary Love’ by clicking here.

I can’t recycle previously published blog posts forever, and since I’m really not a huge V-Day kind of gal, I’m always pretty stumped when February comes along. If this were a Cosmo cover, I’m sure the headline would read, “How to Tell If He’s the One,” or, “How to Make Your Relationship Last Forever,” but I’m not about that life, so let’s just focus on the different kind of relationships we have in our lives that are so incredibly telling of our path, and that even help us to better align with our truth.

Just recently, I experienced an extremely difficult lesson in life where in short, a very close friend who I have so much love and respect for, decided that she no longer needed me in her life due to a scheduling conflict. She and I had plans, and very last minute, I had to rearrange my schedule due to a client’s request and without proper notice, I couldn’t make the planned lunch. Although I was upset that my schedule got switched around, I reached out with an apology and an offer to take her out the following week. Long story short, I was gossiped about to mutual friends, was called a flake, my integrity was belittled, and I was passively told to “rest in peace.” Yes, this moment was absolutely shocking to me as it probably is to you, and to be honest, it brought back some extreme visceral reactions to when I was bullied as a child–not at all congruent with the yummy energy I go out of my way to achieve, so needless to say, it was a very uncomfortable energetic exchange.

But, what is actually very soothing about going through this is that even while explaining this to you, I have nothing but love and gratitude to this person. The best analogy I can provide is that it’s essentially the end of a chapter. Had this person not entered my life 2 years ago, I wouldn’t even know what “living your purpose” is. Because of her, I took the biggest leap of faith in my life because she helped me uncover my gifts and calling, and that relationship will always have a tremendus impact on me.

I think in this instance, I would equate this being as a personal soulmate.

I blame romantic comedies for the very misconstrued role of soulmates, so I don’t at all view soulmates as the greater majority of society does. But atlas, ten years ago, I too was on that same daunting and exhausting search of finding the only person in the world who was meant for me. It was impossible, disappointing, and emotionally taxing. And the culprit of all of that nonsense is because I was not at all conscious of what a soulmate even is, but now I recognize that I’ve encountered literally dozens of soulmates.

And, so have you.

Okay, so let’s break this down. What is a soulmate? Well, from personal experience, these are beings in your life who have entered in all forms, romantic, professional, personal–believe me, the line-up of soulmates do not discriminate how they enter your life. This person comes to essentially reawaken dormant emotions, and ignite some serious lessons to challenge and awaken your identity. Soulmates are very temporary figures, and once you’ve learned your karmic lesson, you are typically separated from this person moving forward. Or, your communication slowly diminishes, and simply put, you two go your separate ways.

I’m sure you’re mentally reviewing your past relationships and now recognizing how much stronger you are in retrospect, or feel like you wouldn’t be the same person without that relationship. Well, congratulations, you’ve been soulmated.

Now, let’s put some energy into finding your Soul-Partner.

So, the whole soulmate thing is actually kind of easy. What isn’t, however, is finding a life-partner. I swear I intend to publish a book about all of the terrible and toxic relationships I have ever been in, but it’s because I wasn’t entering those relationships with the intent of partnership. I wanted rom-com style love, not genuine, endearing, human interaction that is meaningful and transcendent.

If you listen closely, you’ll actually find that I introduce my life-partner, as literally, my partner. I value and respect our relationship enough to declare to everyone, hey, here’s my awesome partner, see us in all of our awesome, partnered glory.

The beauty of a partnership is the dual love and respect that is shared since that seed of intention is set by both parties to commit and find stability together.

I was once talking to a friend (actually, the same soulmate explained from above) and naturally,  some insecurities kicked in a little bit and I became worried that my relationship wasn’t like those around me. You know, the couples that post pictures of themselves kissing every 2 seconds, or who make-out in public in front of everyone, which just makes it more awkward since they go so out of their way to display their relationship? 

When I shared my concerns, my friend said to me with eyes so wide, “Are you serious? I see you two in a room, two strong, independent mates who command attention by not commanding everyone’s attention. That is the partnership that everyone should strive to have.”

And that conversation always stuck with me, because it’s so representative of my journey of being a strong, secure person who isn’t dependent on anyone for my own happiness. Yes, I receive happiness every single day through my relationship, but ultimately, I connect to my own source and invest more energy into my spiritual growth and development. If it weren’t for self-love, I certainly wouldn’t be the kind of partner I am today, and I would not be able to receive the many blessings I receive from my partner each day.

So, to briefly summarize the insanely long point in this post, be grateful for your soulmates–they come into our lives for a reason. And when they leave, just shower yourself with gratitude because you each taught one another valuable lessons that are detrimental in aligning you with your authentic-self, and most likely, shaping you to be a better partner with the companion who is meant to fulfill both roles of soulmate and life-partner.

Many blessings,

Darryn K. Robinson, CWC




Inspiration In The Least Likely of Places (For Vince)

For those who aren’t residents of Southern California, as someone originally from the East Coast, I feel pretty confident admitting that every single stereotype you have ever come across that portrays SoCal at its finest is pretty much spot on. Have you seen the SNL skit The Californians? If not, I beg you to YouTube a sketch at this very moment, and of course come back to finishing this article ASAP because I swear there’s a superb point in here that relates to my SoCal lifestyle.

My boyfriend Vince is the quintessential California man that embodies all of the characteristics of a true Californian. I’ve known Vince for about 5 years, and in basically the first 5 minutes of knowing him I saw him as the poster boy of San Diego. He owns 4 surfboards, and if he’s not surfing, turns into the most evil person I know, there’s a skateboard always planted right by the front door which he frequently utilizes to run our Husky, he’s got the whole personality down (minus the over-usage of the words dude and bro, two pet peeves of his), and it’s even evident in his style since he goes through Van’s like I have never witnessed before.

A few months ago, he was beyond hyped for a new movie that was being released We Are Blood, and naturally I was the best girlfriend in the world and got him a copy for Christmas (which might I add was a daunting task since it was sold out for months). We often watch documentaries about surfing or skating together since those are two big hobbies for him, so this past Sunday wasn’t anything entirely groundbreaking when we decided to finally watch We Are Blood.

I don’t surf, or skate, so my attention often goes to being fascinated to mere boredom, so I was floating in and out of mental consciousness while watching this with him. A major theme this year has been that of “inspiration in the least likely of places” and I am so grateful that I watched this over the weekend, because it reinforced such a huge part of my work, which is visualization and manifestation.

Now, I realize the whole LOA thing sounds very woo-woo and impossible to master, but in reality, it’s allllllll around us. And regardless of career, industry or pursuit, we are subconsciously mastering the art of manifestation to propel us to our desires. And something that I learned while watching this, is the power of visualization for pro-skaters (and by all means, insert any athletic title, the same applies) is real. Like, really real.

See, the thing with these movies about skateboarding or surfing is that for the most part, you are absolutely in awe at what these individuals are doing in the word. In this particular documentary, they traveled from Los Angeles to San Francisco, San Francisco to Barcelona, Barcelona to Brazil with one mission–to master architecture that most of us only marvel at in an aesthetic sense. These completely insane yet courages skateboarders (to me, anyway) view these landmarks as a conquest, they see pavement and textures as meant to be tested, angles and hills that are meant to be maneuvered. So much of the documentary is just flawless execution, but there is always that one little component they fretfully shed light on:


Guys, some of these “when skateboarding goes wrong” clips were just BAD. I mean, my eyes closed, not even able to fathom what that could have felt like bad. But, each and every time, you saw them get right back on that board until they got it right. With blood dripping through their clothes, bruised bones, some even fractured, they consistently kept going.

One of the skateboarders who was narrating a scene said:

Once you start trying a trick, you can’t stop because you keep seeing the trick in your mind, and you just have to go at it until it becomes reality.

And every single trick did become a reality. In one scene, it was mesmerizing to see one particular skateboarder literally acting out what the trick would be like. He wasn’t completely in motion, but he was adjusting his body and angling his skateboard continually acting it out before he launched. And sometimes in life, that’s the fire we need–to act out exactly what we want, envision it clearly, until it’s within reach, and no longer a thought, or even a fear.

Visualization is such a powerful tool in attracting desired outcomes that it’s almost uncanny how powerful it is. I create a vision board every single year, and sometimes I’m freaked out looking at my board towards the end of the year to see all that I manifested, without even realizing it. Visualization is a tool that I used last week in a particularly stressful situation and I manifested HUGE events, one after another. Yes, the fear was present, and sometimes hard to overcome, but my desired outcome was so mentally clear that I didn’t leave room for any doubt to overshadow what I knew would soon be my reality.

So, sometimes, inspiration does find us in the least likely of places, and I’m so happy I was there to be reminded of this by a professional skateboarder who always taps into the power of visualization, which might I add, is working pretty well for him in his very lucrative and successful career.

And, I guess it’s also worth mentioning that sometimes visualization isn’t easy, and that doesn’t mean it’s not meant to be. Be prepared to be bruised and scarred, you might even be a little broken, but your faith mends all; trust in your higher self to guide you and deliver exactly what it is that you want. It’s really that simple.

With 2016 quickly approaching, I invite you to honor yourself and your desires by sitting quietly, envisioning all you wish to create and attract next year, write them down, and if you have the time, create a vision board.

And, to my incredible boyfriend Vince, I hope this post did you justice.

What are you ready to create as a tangible, REAL thing in your life that just needs some watering by a wild imagination?

Love and blessings,

Darryn K. Robinson, CWC



Humility: A Lesson From Top Chef

When that tiny little seed of creating a brand about personal and global empowerment was planted, I have searched high and low for sources of inspiration to further evolve my relationship with these yummy topics that I’m always so pumped to share with you all. What I’m finding is that some of the most moving a-ha! moments I’m attracting are being felt in the least conspicuous of places.

Like, you know, just sitting at home watching an episode of Top Chef.

Not so shameless plug, but my cousin Kwame Onwuachi is a contestant this year and in addition to sheer pride and awe at what Kwame is doing in the world (and absolutely dominating this niche, might I add), his talent is so, so multifaceted, and it goes beyond his mere renowned culinary skill set. After literally being at the edge of my seat screaming at Tom Collichio to being the ultimate deciding factor for his dish to win, (#kwameforpresident), I was so humbled by his own state of pure, unbridled, genuine humility. For those that haven’t seen the episode, allow me to summarize the events:

Kwame, yet again, was recognized for being the badass chef that he is, won the challenge (ps, what’s up with that barrel of wine cousin?!), and Kwame also became the most inspiring chef I have EVER seen on that show.

You know those moments when you’ve given your best, but your best just wasn’t good enough, and you had a single person who honored your presence, held space for you, and reminded you of your talent?

Oh, you haven’t? That’s because it doesn’t happen very often. Very, very few people take that simple yet quality amount of time to be authentic without a hidden agenda of their own. But it happened on national television.  While Kwame was consoling this chef in complete distraught, that energetic exchange was just pure magic. And what I loved most about that moment is that it reminded me of two very important lessons:

  1. Always do your best
  2. Mistakes are not the enemy

Another fantastically talented cousin of mine who has been instrumental in my journey, De Angela, sent me a book when I was a teenager called The Four Agreements. I read this book about 5 times a year, and I’ve had it since I was 14 years old. Anyway, what Ruiz shares about this agreement is:

Always do your best. Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.

What I’ve always loved about this agreement brings me to my second point, mistakes are NOT the enemy. Because, when you know that you even tried to deliver your best, where is the fault in that? I am confident that Chef Wesley went into that challenge totally committed to preparing an incredible meal, but a technique failed. And I would also bet money that he will never fail that technique again, because that challenge utlimately taught him something. And as Kwame shared with us, even the best of the best falter. But that doesn’t define them. And it doesn’t define you, either.

See, mistakes really aren’t the enemy. Our thoughts that we exacerbate that become limiting beliefs, however, are.

I know this is a different post than what I normally create, but I felt so compelled to share this since that moment last week was so special for me to witness.

I’m so grateful to my amazing cousin Kwame for teaching such profound and subtle takeaways that resonate with so many of us.

And with that said, since I am a coach and turn every moment into a coachable moment, what area in your life are you going to give yourself permission to learn pivotal lessons, even if it means taking a risk?

Love and blessings, and as always, be LIFTED!

Darryn K. Robinson, CWC



A Quiet Noise

Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray. –Rumi

Recently, I’ve had this overwhelming sense of confirmation, and even heightened revelations about what it means to be called to do something. And although I struggle to literally explain how this calling may present itself to you, I imagine it’s something like this:

You’re in crowded space, let’s say at of one of your favorite restaurants on a Friday night at 8 PM. Tables hosting boisterous conversation, reunited souls, physical and spiritual communion surrounds you. You’re savoring every bite of your delectable meal, completely enthralled in friendly banter with your tribe, when all of a sudden, you become a little startled because you can swear someone just called your name. You look up, behind you, maybe even get out of your seat to scope the room.

Nothing. Not a person in sight, or even a sign that you’re close to locating the source of that distracting voice.

But, you’re SO sure someone called your name. It remains a mystery, the phantom voice doesn’t make its presence known, but you know, it was there.

(I never said I was a fictional writer guys, so deal with my elementary analogy). 

When I was a child, I poured everything into writing. I started writing poetry in elementary school, had my first poem published when I was in the 5th grade (I was convinced I was going to give Shakespeare a run for his money), and from then on, poetry was my creative outlet. At one point in my childhood, I stopped writing for a few years and because I wasn’t used to exercising that creative muscle, I was verbally out of shape, but when that voice urged me to go to my room, take out a piece of paper and pen and sit on my bed, those words found a home. And only my parents and grandparents could confirm this number since they have every copy of my collection of poetry, but I think from about the age of 14 to graduating high school, I wrote over 50 poems (between being a displaced teenager who could never fit in, and my peers being criminally cruel, I had a lot to say when ironically, I couldn’t say anything at all).

How some kids liked to play sports, or play video games, or dance, writing was my equivalent. Words haunted me in all the right ways. When I was introduced to literary icons, my world changed. I felt so inferior to these creative geniuses yet so complete at the same time.

Artistic expression through words was everything.

So, this is where that awesome thing that Rumi refers to as the “silent pull” kind of thing got weird.

I stopped.

Reality reared its ugly head at me, and when I realized that only the 1% actually move to New York City, live in Greenwich Village and worked at coffee shops with their MacBooks and black coffee while creating a New York’s Time Bestseller, I gave up. I actually remember while in college sharing that vision with a fellow English major, she looked at me like I was crazy and said, “Yeah, I’ll be happy if I can score a job as an assistant editor, you realize that kind of success is rare?”…and it threw me off, I wasn’t prepared to accept that possibility, but I did.

I’m not sure if you’ve ever strayed away from that ever so subtle, but oh so powerful magnetic noise, but I have. And as much as I appreciate those years where I didn’t open up a notebook, not even to journal, I needed that very low period to remind me why I’m so completely obsessed with sharing with people why you must listen, why you must pursue, why you must even try to be led by your purpose. I’m living proof that when you refuse to listen to your calling, your calling will find you.

I realize how creepy that sounds, and in no way am I implying that your calling is something to be feared, but that voice does amplify, that restlessness within will eventually tire. This is when the most beautiful transition occurs because you’re surrendering to that higher power and trusting what you’re being called to do.

So, this is my journey. I honor that yours is different. I am a firm believer that we are all given very unique talents we’re destined to share with the world, and please know that in any setting you find yourself in, you can still tap into that creative space. As much as I think it would be so awesome if we all abandoned careers and jobs that aren’t serving us to live out our calling, I know it’s not financially possible or responsible, so I would encourage you to assess your environment and incorporate your gift into that role. I’m blessed to finally be in a role where writing is a huge and intricate instrument in my career, and although I’m not able to write creatively every single day, I’m still grateful to be able to communicate my expression even if its only through boring, monotonous case notes that are tedious and highly factual, but necessary to do in my field.

I hope you feel more empowered to listen to that quiet rhythm in midst of the noise, and trust that it’s leading you exactly where you’re meant to thrive.

Love and blessings!

Darryn K. Robinson, CWC




A few weeks ago, I sat down at a coffee shop for nearly 4 hours searching the depths of my creative juiciness trying to figure out what I could possibly write about for not only my blog, but my monthly business newsletter. I try to set the intention to have material published at the beginning of each month, but I’m 15 days into the month, so clearly I’m setting a new trend.

And, I think I’m okay with this. What I learned during those grueling 4 hours was that I shouldn’t have to search the perimeters of my memory and experiences to try and inspire my audience, but inspiration should rather find me so that I can articulate this journey in a more personal and intimate way.

The Universe can be so hysterical at times and it’s like the old classic advice “be careful what you wish for” because these past few days have been a WHIRLWIND of perspective and inspiration. A lot of revelations are surfacing, and I’m being confronted with some interesting lessons, and even more, affirming some of the biggest values that align with my purpose and passion.

I work in human services, so it’s one of those career paths that can blow your mind with rewards and satisfaction, but also has the power to take a lot out of you. No one is exempt from that, I’m certainly not trying to put myself on a pedestal, but to put it bluntly, some days can reaallllly kick my ass.

Recently, I’ve been so engulfed in a current situation that emotionally and mentally, my actions have pretty much made me a total hypocrite for what I’ve expressed like a million times in this blog to share with you. All that talk about serving yourself first, maintaining your energy, being lifted, implementing the art of mindfulness, energy vampires, yes, all that delicious, valuable information that is meant to make us our best selves yet, TOTALLY out the window from my side of the world.

But in this moment of straying away from my mission, my truth, I actually validated something and the experience was so simple, perhaps it could even be viewed as insignificant, but the epiphany finally came.

To briefly summarize the events of the day, it was terrible, emotionally draining, my mind couldn’t even process the multitude of self-defeating thoughts I was subscribing to. On a whim, I decided to go to a yoga class even though I hadn’t been planning on it, and I’m an avid yoga lover so I thought it would just be another ordinary day of showing off my posture and balance and creating a pool of sweat on my yoga mat.

But what happened–literally the second my body surrendered to my mat, and my head dropped down and I stretched my arms and kneeled into child’s pose was extraordinary. I didn’t realize it in the moment, but 60 minutes after the fact, I was amazed. Without an ounce of exaggeration, my yoga practice completely took me out of the negativity from my day, and the feelings of being belittled and undermined, and from my frustration, and those limiting beliefs that decided to linger around when they weren’t welcome. When the class was over, although this isn’t entirely a new revelation to me, I realized that for a full 60 minutes, I didn’t allow any of that into my space. I don’t even think I was thinking if that’s possible. It was breath, and movement. Breath. Movement.

This is the power of mindfulness and a testament of how quickly you are able to transform whatever state you find yourself in. This doesn’t require a trip to a yoga studio, you can practice this in any modality that completely takes you away from your thoughts. In just 60 minutes, I was connected to my body, my soul, and even my purpose. I honored my body for its strength and I was just consumed with gratitude and it was pouring out of me in that room with my other fellow yogis.

I don’t know if you’ve ever had a moment like that before, when the darkness finally succumbed, when the storm finally settled, and you realize, wow, I’m alive and I have so much to be grateful for, why am I even giving power to these events that can easily be resolved? And on Wednesday, I made a very decisive decision to remove myself from my biggest stressor at the moment.

It was that easy.

So, my message to you is simple. Remind yourself that you have the ability to take yourself out of any equation (in a good way) and that anything that is not serving you, you really can relinquish. Even when you feel stuck or obliged, like seriously, it can be released.

And I would also like to mention that on the same day, right after my class and commuting to my next destination, my car broke down. And yes, it was frightening and nerve-racking, but in that moment, there was also a peace about knowing that resolution would come, I could only control what I could control, and all was still well with the world.

Where will you escape to, or free yourself from today to remind yourself of your worth and value to the world?

Love and blessings (and thank you for bearing with me while it took me a century to get this out!)

Darryn K. Robinson, CWC




The Power of the Narrative

I have a tremendous obsession with literature–there’s a 90% chance that I’ve read, reread and academically analyzed any great work of literature from the greatest writers of our time. As a child, I would much rather grab a book and isolate myself in my bedroom, stretching the depths of my imagination and escaping for just a moment of time where I became characters, and characters became me, and our realities merged together in a fictional love affair that can only occur while reading a perfect, moving masterpiece of words.

While studying English in college, I quickly understood that the art of writing was rewriting and I began to appreciate this gift as I felt connected to my literary heroes, understanding that their stories faced multiple revisions before becoming recognized pieces of literature that are still relevant in our culture today. This was somehow comforting to me, and I am still comforted knowing that as a writer, editing is literally my best friend.

Furthermore, as an adult, I am also understanding the power of narrative in a way unlike any other, because I am applying the principles of narrative to my thoughts and life. When I was a child, for instance, I was bullied by kids because of the way that I looked and the way that I spoke. I can still hear the flood of words these kids would say, in unison, when I was on my way to school, in the hallways, or just going home. These events literally destroyed me, and crushed my sense of self in just my elementary years of developing my identity. I can’t really remember a time when I wasn’t bullied–these events occurred even through high school.

This is the power of the narrative–someone else’s words can haunt us in a such a way that we accept their perception and reject our own identity.

What is interesting about my experiences of being bullied–and this is a powerful example of how the mind works–is that every single flaw these kids were presenting to me, I had seriously never even recognized or noticed about myself. In my world, I was perfectly fine, innocent and navigating just as I should. But after being stabbed by words that made me almost hate my parents for even birthing me and making me look the way I did, I began to truly view myself in a way of constant disapproval and criticism. I was seeing myself the way these kids did, and as an adult who has been so far removed from these events due to time and maturity, I still find myself hiding behind my insecurities and being reminded of my flaws.








Their story now became mine. Their reality was suddenly true. I would sulk around my house terrified to go to school because not only did I have to face my own thoughts, but I had to receive confirmation of how much I actually hated my thoughts because the chorus of hatred and criticism amplified my insecurities.

But, just like Hemingway took that moment to revise chapter 2 of The Sun Also Rises, or Hughes rethought I Too, Am America, or Salinger reworked The Catcher in the Rye, are we not as capable of finding the biggest mechanical pencil that exists, make a few corrections, erase what it isn’t working and rewrite our chapter? I’m not certain at one point assertiveness poured through me, but I finally understood that I am the only expert of my life therefore the only writer and editor of my life’s story.

And a story is just a story after all–if we don’t like it, we change it. If we’re not pleased with a chapter, that’s why books are comprised of at least 10 of them. And if we’re just not thrilled with the first edition or we feel that there’s more to say, that’s why series exist–push yourself to your next act, the following part. Remember, only you have the power to change your narrative. Don’t allow others stories to become yours, live through content that embodies your truth, your soul.

Now, go write your story.

May your revisions and editing be moving, revealing and inspiring!

Love and many blessings,

Darryn K. Robinson, CWC


Thinking Superficially

Hi, I’m Darryn and I’m a wandering implementer of effective habits. By wandering, I mean that MOST of the time, I am very intentional about my thoughts, decisions and actions while at other times, well, I’m not. I’m the first person to offer sound advice to those in need, aid others in living consciously and mindfully, and then 10 minutes finding myself uttering words and statements that are not congruent with my affirmations and therefore stifle my spiritual development and growth. I’m literally amazed that I’m not living in a homeless shelter at this point for as much as I utter, “I wish I could afford to do that, or buy that, or have that.”

Recently, I’m starting to understand that as creators, we’re almost like carpenters–bear with me as I attempt to illustrate my point. If I can use an old home to represent old thoughts, you start seeing areas that need some revamping and a little TLC. Perhaps, the structure is dated, obscure, and okay, it’s probably hideous–what was happening in the 70’s is probably at this point falling apart, no longer serving the resident, and needs to be repaired, if not replaced. We can maybe do some superficial work, you know, like pick out a gorgeous color of paint to freshen things up a bit, change up the carpeting and flooring, tear down some walls and make the necessary upgrades. But often times, the superficial adjustments are just that: SUPERFICIAL. Paint wears. Carpet dulls. Empty space is meaningless if not utilized appropriately. What probably would have been best, though the most time consuming, would be to totally discard allllllllllll the unnecessary and rebuild that foundation. Our thoughts and beliefs are exactly the same.

A superficial thought, unlike an intentional thought is like the DIY of thought-forms. We digest the latest and greatest in self-development, we’ve watched The Secret, we’ve even read The Secret, and The Power, and The Magic; we write our affirmations, we state them 3 times in the morning, afternoon and evening; we shop the catalog of the Universe, visualizing our future home, our future car, our future vacation; we write in our Gratitude Journal and do our meditation and align with positive thinking. And, we pretty much do that until we don’t. And even when we are in that space, are we spiritually speaking fully there? We still find ourselves experiencing scarcity, feeling stuck, facing resistance and questioning this whole intentional way of living.

In order to ensure that our thoughts are not masked by the superficial, we have to treat our minds like we would that hideous home in dire need of serious TLC and fixing up. We can’t repeat affirmations if we aren’t ready to actually let go what is keeping us from reaching what it is that we really, really want. We can’t just record a few things in our Gratitude Journal because we’re supposed to, we need to really feel gratitude in our heart as that is more meaningful than jotting down a few awesome things that happened to you on a piece of paper. We owe it to ourselves to release the superficial and actually live with intention!

So, this brings me to my interpretation of Stephen R. Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People; although, I wish to illustrate 7 habits of highly-NON effective people:

1. A highly non-effective person is REACTIVE rather than PROACTIVE. Being reactive is constantly having a visceral reaction to events around them, feeling as if one is a victim, and not being assertive about the events in their lives.

2. A highly non-effective person does not visualize the full picture. If we can’t envision our goals and desires, we will never achieve such things. We must honor this experience by abandoning our linear way of thinking and running wild with our imagination, and painting this picture vividly in our minds, daily to actually manifest it.

3. A highly non-effective person does not understand the art of priorities. And as I’ve articulated many times, our biggest priority is honoring ourselves, and serving our needs first. The highly non-effective overextends, is easily drained and is not assertive enough to implement emotional and physical boundaries.

4. A highly non-effective person sees life as a competition and thrives on the opinions of others. Although it is wonderful to be affirmed by others, the highly non-effective person lives by this. This is a person who feels the need to start first and finish first, not collaborating with others or seeing the process as interactive and dynamic.

5. A highly non-effective person does not understand the delicate dance of listening. As communicators, we are constantly processing and formulating a response when often times, we are not hearing and truly listening to the person whom we are interacting with.

6. A highly non-effective person would rather ride solo than grow through the collective process. We’ve all encountered this kind of person, the person who just isn’t a team player or respects collaboration and cooperation.

7. And lastly, a highly non-effective person does not invest in themselves physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually and does not live their life with balance in mind.

At some point in time, we’ve all been the NON-effective person, but the amazing thing about habits are that they’re either meant to be broken, or, adversely, meant to be formed, so adjust this to your life accordingly. It is my hope that you form a new habit around breaking superficial thinking and living with intention by not mirroring my interpretation of the the 7 habits that are only stifling us from being our best.

I wish you well on breaking those superficial thoughts!

Love and many blessings,

Darryn K. Robinson, CWC

be + LIFTED Wellness Coaching

To schedule your FREE consultation with Darryn, click HERE.